On the train home Fred was bothering me but I blocked him out. I had a lot to think about and I did not want him interfering in my joy at being with Lisa. I am happy for her and I know she is happy for me…but her reaching out was a cry for help. I know she underplayed what was happening with Fred. So we are both in danger again… together…
As I spoke about before The Middle Place is a strange and scary but I have grown use to it. I suspect that Freddy has killed up to 50 or so people since we have been together. He has killed people that in my eyes deserved to die and I think he kills these types to keep me relaxed.
I have recently noticed that he has been blocking my view of Springwood and until now I did not care. I do feel that Springwood treated me and my family indifferently and pushed us out of sight… sometimes even denied we existed. That our experience was so different that it did not fit the profile of Fred’s MO that obviously, decease I was a sick killer, self loathing and they quickly dismissed and buried us all.
The fools believe that Fred is unable to walk among them in the daylight… they so enjoy the little game they play, making a myth around him… that they really can not put together the real him and the heightened danger. If they had spent time with me, ask me… they would know more.
Now it is here in my paintings and this journal.
I can see a day when people read this and their only contact with Fred is though the films… that should be interesting… still I want them to know that it is much more gruesome than you see in the films. There is a whole sexual element that they do not show you. I guess for fear of getting an X rating. The scene in the first movie with Nancy in the bathtub is the most accurate display of his perversion… now take it to the next level and let him rape and slice her from her vagina to her heart… then you will understand what we are dealing with here… then he watches as the family finds their child and he laughs. That is the part he likes the best.
So this is who we are dealing with. The little games he plays in the movies are just the first act, the foreplay if you will. Fred would cut the baby right out of Lisa and watch her die… with her heart breaking… that would be a good day for him. So I am wise to be careful… again I go back to the fact that I want to survive, I want to live. Is that wrong?
Tonight I am going to let Colin know the truth… so he can get out before the war begins. I will miss him holding me in his arms.
I must paint this now… my story for the world to see.